Walk out of life

love is pain
but I am not a masochist
don’t get me wrong
I like pain
live with it everyday
just to fight it
overcome
win
conquer the animal made around me
all that meat with its failing functions

but the animal wants to seed my fears
see me scared
weak
becomes a demon
threatens
screams with my face in all mirrors of hell here

What am I to do?
I just walk out of the animal then
come back later
for more or less the same
since each life is a struggle through Valley of Death
anyway
sometimes you look back at it
searching for love
pain
that makes you feel again
alive